* Selected as One of the Best Books of the 21st Century by The New York Times * * WINNER of the National Book Critics Circle Award * Books for a Better Life Award * The New York Times Book Review ’s 10 Best Books of the Year * This masterpiece by the National Book Award–winning author of The Noonday Demon features stories of parents who not only learn to deal with their exceptional children, but also find profound meaning in doing so—“a brave, beautiful book that will expand your humanity” ( People ). Solomon’s startling proposition in Far from the Tree is that being exceptional is at the core of the human condition—that difference is what unites us. He writes about families coping with deafness, dwarfism, Down syndrome, autism, schizophrenia, or multiple severe disabilities; with children who are prodigies, who are conceived in rape, who become criminals, who are transgender. While each of these characteristics is potentially isolating, the experience of difference within families is universal, and Solomon documents triumphs of love over prejudice in every chapter. All parenting turns on a crucial question: to what extent should parents accept their children for who they are, and to what extent they should help them become their best selves. Drawing on ten years of research and interviews with more than three hundred families, Solomon mines the eloquence of ordinary people facing extreme challenges. Elegantly reported by a spectacularly original and compassionate thinker, Far from the Tree explores how people who love each other must struggle to accept each other—a theme in every family’s life.

Recommended on 2 episodes:

What Relationships Would You Want, if You Believed They Were Possible?

Around 40 percent of people who marry eventually get a divorce. Almost half of children are born to unmarried women. The number of close friends Americans report having has been on a steep decline since the 1990s, especially among men. Millions of us are growing old alone. We are living out a radical experiment in how we live, love, parent and age — and for many, it’s failing. That’s partial context, I think, for the recent burst of interest and media coverage of polyamory. People want more love in their lives, and opening their relationships is one way to find it. A poll from last year found that one-third of Americans believe their ideal relationship would involve something other than strict monogamy. But polyamory, for all its possibilities, isn’t right for many, and it doesn’t have that much to say about parenting or aging or friendship. As radical as it may sound, it’s not nearly radical enough. It’s not just romance that could be imagined more expansively. It’s everything. “If this is such a significant relationship in my life, why is there no term for it?” wonders NPR’s Rhaina Cohen about a relationship that transcends the language we have available for friendship. Her forthcoming book, “The Other Significant Others: Reimagining Life With Friendship at the Center,” is a window into a world of relational possibilities most of us never even imagined existed. It’s a call to open up what we can conceive of as possible. Some of these models might appeal to you. Others might not. But they all pose a question worth asking: What kinds of relationships would you want in your life, if you felt you could ask for them?

Books recommended:

• 📕  Far From the Tree: Parents, Children and the Search for Identity by Andrew Solomon
• 📘  We All Want Impossible Things: A Novel by Catherine Newman
• 📗  Thy Neighbor's Wife by Gay Talese

Rhaina Cohen Feb. 6, 2024 3 books recommended

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From politician to priest

Books recommended:

• 📙  Far From the Tree: Parents, Children and the Search for Identity by Andrew Solomon
• 📕  The Jesuit Guide to (Almost) Everything: A Spirituality for Real Life by James Martin
• 📘  Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion by Gregory Boyle
• 📗  Laudato Si': On Care for Our Common Home by Pope Francis, Catholic Church

May 28, 2020 4 books recommended

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